Hello, my friends.
I recently had a conversation with a coaching client where he was in the middle of a really tough situation. If you know anything about coaching, you know we do not solve the problem for our clients. We are the co-pilot. We are simply listening to what the client is saying; coaching the person, not the situation.
We are listening to the circumstances that the person is presenting and then asking the right questions.
The coaching client, with a little bit of assistance, was able to work through the priorities, and make a decision. He was very complimentary at the end.
He said, “Ed, I don’t know how you do it, but you help me declutter these things, when prior to the call, I am paralyzed, and I am not sure what to do.”
My response to him was, “You can’t see the picture when you are in the frame.”
He had never heard that expression before. I didn’t invent it. I first heard it from Les Brown, a great speaker and personal friend.
“You can’t see the picture when you’re in the frame” is a way of describing the perspective distortion that we have when we’re in the middle of a challenging set of circumstances.
Have you ever heard, “Oh, I’m too close to it,” or “I can’t see the forest for the trees?”
It’s a matter of looking at your ability – or in some cases your inability – to make clear decisions based upon your proximity to not only the information, but the emotion and all of the other human characteristics that go into decision making.
This is where having an outsider’s perspective helps you gain clarity. The outsider is someone who is emotionally detached from the circumstances – someone who is outside the frame so they can look at the picture as objectively as possible. Of course, no one is truly objective. We all look at things with subjective eyes and hear with subjective ears, but outside perspective is a major source of value.
If you find yourself in a state of analysis paralysis or in a place where you are stuck, step away and describe the situation to either a coach or someone who is close to you. Reach out to someone who knows you well, that cannot so much solve the problem for you (that’s really not helpful in the long run) but someone who can ask you the right questions.
When you’re facing a challenge – an obstacle – ask yourself: “Because I’m in the frame, can I see this picture clearly?”
If you are not, reach beyond the frame to get a clearer perspective.
It is important to get the help you need so you get the clearer perspective. If you need help in this area, consider the Ascend on Demand program. Many have benefited from this online coaching program.